１５ Ｊｕｌｙ， Ｔｏｓｈｉｋａ Ｍａｓａｋｉ
文字数 3,363文字
I’m a Dog
I’m a dog. I live with my human mother—just the two of us.
Mom is a novelist. From what I can make out, it’s a job where you sit at a desk clattering away on a square thing. I like lying stretched out on the sofa watching her back and listening to it.
But just now she isn’t going
Right now she’s stroking me and crying. It could be because today when she carried me outside, a lady I didn’t know exclaimed “Poor thing!” when she saw me. I’m blind and I can’t stand— maybe that’s why she said it.
I don’t know the meaning of “Poor thing.”
“Fun” is the feeling of running over grass. “Joy” is the feeling of getting a treat. “Love” is the feeling of thinking of Mom. All these together is the feeling of happiness. The whole world shines, and my tail wags hard. But though I don’t know the meaning of “poor thing,” those words make my tail droop.
Poor thing—I heard that said long ago, too, before I came to live with Mom.
I was abandoned by my first family. I was already blind by then, and I had endless diarrhea that made me filthy and smelly. Everyone said “Poor thing!” when they saw me, but not Mom. Instead she smiled and said “Sweet thing!”
How long has passed since then, I wonder? In no time now, I’ll shed my soft, fluffymiserable old body and make Mom glow with my new glittering light. Sometimes I’ll be the wind. I’ll be the sky. I’ll be a sparrow. I’ll be the scent of flowers. And I’ll talk to you, Mom.
Humans seem to be creatures who look at the sad things in life rather than the happy ones—I guess that’s why Mom must be crying. But don’t look at the fact I’ve died, look at the fact that I lived. Look at the bright things, not the dark ones, just like you did when you said back then I was sweet. If you don’t, you won’t be able to hear my voice.
I’ll be born again some day, and I’ll send you a message, Mom. So make sure you look at the happy things, don’t overlook them. That’s where I’ll be, you see.
I’m happy. The proof is that I wag my tail. Watch. Okay, just for now, bye bye.
Translated by Meredith McKinney/Arranged by TranNet KK
Toshika Masaki
Born in 1965. Currently resides in Sapporo City, Hokkaido Prefecture. Won the 41st Hokkaido Shimbun Literature Award in 2007 for “Chiru saku meguru” (Scatter, bloom, surround). Made her literary debut in 2008 with
I’m a dog. I live with my human mother—just the two of us.
Mom is a novelist. From what I can make out, it’s a job where you sit at a desk clattering away on a square thing. I like lying stretched out on the sofa watching her back and listening to it.
Clatterclatterclatter
. That’s the sound her fingers make. It’s the sound of having my Mom nearby. It makes me relax, and then I get sleepy.But just now she isn’t going
clatterclatter
like she normally does. She’s spending all day stroking me. I like the clatter, but I’m even fonder of being stroked by her.Right now she’s stroking me and crying. It could be because today when she carried me outside, a lady I didn’t know exclaimed “Poor thing!” when she saw me. I’m blind and I can’t stand— maybe that’s why she said it.
I don’t know the meaning of “Poor thing.”
“Fun” is the feeling of running over grass. “Joy” is the feeling of getting a treat. “Love” is the feeling of thinking of Mom. All these together is the feeling of happiness. The whole world shines, and my tail wags hard. But though I don’t know the meaning of “poor thing,” those words make my tail droop.
Poor thing—I heard that said long ago, too, before I came to live with Mom.
I was abandoned by my first family. I was already blind by then, and I had endless diarrhea that made me filthy and smelly. Everyone said “Poor thing!” when they saw me, but not Mom. Instead she smiled and said “Sweet thing!”
How long has passed since then, I wonder? In no time now, I’ll shed my soft, fluffymiserable old body and make Mom glow with my new glittering light. Sometimes I’ll be the wind. I’ll be the sky. I’ll be a sparrow. I’ll be the scent of flowers. And I’ll talk to you, Mom.
Humans seem to be creatures who look at the sad things in life rather than the happy ones—I guess that’s why Mom must be crying. But don’t look at the fact I’ve died, look at the fact that I lived. Look at the bright things, not the dark ones, just like you did when you said back then I was sweet. If you don’t, you won’t be able to hear my voice.
I’ll be born again some day, and I’ll send you a message, Mom. So make sure you look at the happy things, don’t overlook them. That’s where I’ll be, you see.
I’m happy. The proof is that I wag my tail. Watch. Okay, just for now, bye bye.
Translated by Meredith McKinney/Arranged by TranNet KK
Toshika Masaki
Born in 1965. Currently resides in Sapporo City, Hokkaido Prefecture. Won the 41st Hokkaido Shimbun Literature Award in 2007 for “Chiru saku meguru” (Scatter, bloom, surround). Made her literary debut in 2008 with
Yoru
no
sora
no
hoshi
no
(The stars in the night sky). Her works includeKumagane-ke
no
hitorimusume
(The only daughter of the Kumagane household),Kanpeki
na
hahaoya
(A perfect mother),Aru
onna
no
shōmei
(A certain woman’s proof),Otona
ni
narenai
(I can’t become an adult),Ichiban
kanashii
(Most sad),Tamase-ke
kyūgyōchū
(The Tamase household is on break),Yurikago
ni
kiku
(Ask the cradle), andKuzu
no
kesshō
(Crystal of waste), among others. Her latest work isAno
hi,
kimi
wa
nani
o
shita
(What did you do on that day).
